I am fairly certain I am “messing up” as I light the menorah. (Do I allow the shamash to keep burning?) But I learn a bit more each year..(the answer is ‘yes’)

I am fairly certain I am “messing up” as I light the menorah. (Do I allow the shamash to keep burning?) But I learn a bit more each year..(the answer is ‘yes’)
…her brutal truths and long silences which she would wield as weaponry, had been ground down, curved softly into conscious wisdom.
I ascended slightly. I wanted to feel the pain of the full wind coming at me. I wanted to test the strength which I knew I had and therefore, was no test at all.
As I talked, I still felt a bit like the observer, documenting myself and my actions while reminding myself to speak not as a victim but as a proud woman and graceful lady.
The beginnings of flight are incredibly awkward-looking…